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"Maddie." "Lovers?" asked Jalapeno. "But how? If she couldn't be intimate with Eddie, then how . . . ?" Another pen drop. "Maddie, "It ends when I say. Not you. Now be a good girl and be in for your appointment tomorrow. Wear your kneepads. Harv." Brokoli looked up at Jalapeno. "Dated two hours after Maddie's. Guess we got part of it answered." "Yeah, but Len, this'll never stand up in court." "Why not? It was an accident." The door opened. A tall, slender parsnip peeked in. "Detectives? I'm Nurse Lima. I'll show you out now." "Thank you, Nurse." * * *
Eight hours later, after passing a few skins to a judicial friend, Brokoli and Jalapeno led a team of crops into Dr. Ruebarb's office to confiscate his computer. They didn't arrest Ruebarb, yet. As the two detectives got out of their vehicle at the station, a large SUV came careening around the corner. An irate Dr. Ruebarb sat behind the wheel, his face a contorted grimace of rage and agony. The truck bounced off a row of cars on the driver's side and the building on the passenger's. Dr. Ruebarb's arm was sticking out of the window, a gun clutched tightly. Brokoli shoved Jalapeno out of the way, drawing his sidearm as he did. Jumping onto the hood of his cruiser, Brokoli fired three shots into the windshield of the SUV. The bullets found a new home in the large body of Dr. Ruebarb. The
truck caromed off a parked car, then came to a stop after crashing
into a lightpole. Brokoli approached it, gun ready. "Go . . . to . . . Hell . . . ." a wheezy voice gasped. Ruebarb put his gun against his head and fired, taking himself out. The bullet passed through his head and lodged in Brokoli's shoulder. Brokoli collapsed on the sidewalk. Inky blackness surrounded him; as he heard Pedro yell, he fell into the black. * * *
Brokoli came to several hours later in a sterile hospital room. Pedro Jalapeno sat at the side of his bed. "Well, boss, we closed it," Pedro said. "Ruebarb killed Maddie first, angry that she had ended their relationship. Apparently, she'd been blowing him for a couple of months in order to cut down on medical expenses. Then he killed Eddie and Sasha in a fit of rage, blaming Eddie for the end of his relationship with Maddie. It was all in the suicide note. Confessed everything." "Nice work, Pedro." "You, too, Len." As Brokoli fell back into unconsciousness, his last thought was, "I wonder what Dr. del Salade smells like in the morning?"
*** END ***
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